Today was a big day. Billy, Eisley, & I woke up early, had breakfast with friends (I never knew how delicious pancakes with peanut butter are!), and then went out on the town. What would an all-day errand-running adventure be like with our one month-old (Happy 1 month birthday, little one!)? Yes, we've gone out and about with Eisley PLENTY before today, but this was a hot August day, filled with LOTS of errand-running.
First stop? Kohl's. I had a gift card to spend, and needed a new backpack for the first day of school (tomorrow). I found a fabulous pink and brown one that I am totally stoked about. No more boring, worn-out, tan backpack. I am trying to find little things to get me excited about the fact that tomorrow I will leave my daughter in someone else's (very capable) care for a couple of hours, while I try to pay attention in class and return to the world of academia.
Side note: The nights with Eisley have mostly been good, but the other night, we were up with her from 1:30 until 5:30 a.m. It was a bizarre night, that not one of us was thrilled about. All I kept thinking was, "Wow, I'm tired. What if I were trying to write a paper for class right now AND having to deal with an unhappy baby in the middle of the night?". Needless to say-- not sure I'm ready for the semester ahead, but I'm sure going to give it a try.
Next stop? The mall! As we walked through the mall, pushing the stroller, I realized, "Wow. We're the stroller people now. We're a part of THAT group of shoppers"-- Awkwardly pushing the stroller through crowds of people and through tiny aisles in the stores. It was tangible evidence that we really HAVE officially moved into a completely different phase of our lives. You know, besides the fact that there's a baby living in our house. But this was us as parents out in the real world, and somehow it felt different. I am doing a terrible job of explaining the feeling, so I apologize. But it was strange.
I completely regret stepping foot into Baby Gap today-- looking at all of the adorable clothes that we should not be spending our money on. Eisley already has a closet full of clothes, given to her by many generous people. For that we are grateful. But it didn't make me want to buy things for her any less! Cute argyle sweaters and dresses. Adorable corduroy in autumn colors. I walked out of the store empty-handed. It was hard to do, people!
Billy, on the other hand, had a Gap gift card to spend, leftover from Christmas! I'm telling you, he holds on to his money for a long time, wanting to spend it on JUST the right thing. He found some things to buy, and as we were standing in line to pay, a cute little boy (4 or 5 years old) was talking to his mom, pointing at us, talking with glee. He said, "Look! That's a mommy! That's a mommy, and she has a purse!" He said, "Look! That's a mommy and that's her baby. And that (pointing at Billy) must be the daddy! The mommy is a girl and the daddy is a boy."
Again. Welcome to the new phase of our lives. It's fun. And I must admit, I am a little anxious about school tomorrow. And I'm even more anxious about returning to work in 2 weeks-- not because I don't love my job. But because I am realizing just how many different worlds I'll find myself in-- motherhood, school, AND work. I'm tired just thinking about it! I long to return to my school life, and engage in adult conversation about important and challenging things. But I don't want to be away from Eisley and miss out on any wonderfully cute thing she does. I don't want to be one of those people that can only seem to talk about their kid-- but let's face it, our kiddo is pretty cute, and I find myself wanting to talk about her constantly! Of course, my world has revolved around her and only her this past month, so part of the reason I have nothing else to talk about is because I haven't actually DONE anything lately besides be with her. So. Bring it on. My life is about to become one big balancing act.